Most people are under the false impression that Hamburglar steals hamburgs to eat himself....because he loves them. This is false. In fact he steals the burgers to prevent others from consuming them. Years ago his diet consisted exclusively of burgers. But he ended up having a stroke.....that's why he can only say Robble Robble. It's a form of Aphasia. Also that giant front tooth makes it difficult to eat solid food. So he mainly drinks shakes or eats soft serve when the machines not broken. Years of consuming low nutrition food also stunted his growth and prevented a proper puberty. That's why he kinda looks like an old baby. He doesn't have a lady either. He dated for a while in the 80s when he was popular but he's been in a dry spell. Probably cause he always wears the same outfit and it appears to be a Halloween costume. Ronald doesn't return his texts and Grimace only occasionally likes his Facebook posts. Things aren't going very well for the Burglar.
BTW.....Did you know he has several adopted children?
Robble, Roberta, Roblert, Robblina and Larry. Burglar has a heart of gold. Support him.
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